life/death question (poll)

[djonni greazo]

after you poop (assuming you do not, or cannot, use a bidet), do you wipe your ass:



1) standing up (you like the feeling of feces making a solid bridge of pubic hair between your buttcheeks)



2) sitting on the toilet (you enjoy the feeling of your buttcheeks spread and the virtually extended area of wiping)



3) other (please explain)



4) karmakane (you like beneath the mascara and homoerotic buttsecks)



DISCUSS!

[Lavabug]

I just drag my ass on the floor for a while.

[djonni greazo]

interesting technique



another interesting one was explained to me by my cousin (allegedly, it was very popular in the military at the time):

(i call it "the fingerstyle technique")



you take one piece of toilet paper and fold it over itself twice. now, take off the corner at the "fulcrum" so that when you unfold the paper, it has a hole in the middle. now put your middle finger through that hole and then wipe your ass with said finger (without dirtying up the paper). when you think you're done cleaning your rear mess, fold the paper over your finger to clean it then tuck it away (in a pocket) for further use.

[Hugo.]

Coincidently, this came up i conversation yesterday. Sitting down for sure.

[supa tuna]

[quote name="i am the pink lizard"]you take one piece of toilet paper and fold it over itself twice. now, take off the corner at the "fulcrum" so that when you unfold the paper, it has a hole in the middle. now put your middle finger through that hole and then wipe your ass with said finger (without dirtying up the paper). when you think you're done cleaning your rear mess, fold the paper over your finger to clean it then tuck it away (in a pocket) for further use.[/quote]



we were told this in boyscouts, except you also kept the corner you tore off to clean under your nail.



sitting down ftw

[supa tuna]

heres another one.



do you fold or crumple?

[ANGEL OF DESEASE]

I call a secretary of state whore and she clean my ass with her tongue

[supa tuna]

[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]I call a secretary of state whore and she clean my ass with her tongue[/quote]



i'd expect nothing less from AOD

[Haunty]

Sitting down.



[quote name="dickzilla"]heres another one.



do you fold or crumple?[/quote]



Fold.

[Abzu]

[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]I call a secretary of state whore and she clean my ass with her tongue[/quote]

SIG

[Abzu]

Also, fold sitting down.

[supa tuna]

i crumple like woah.



if you fold, you just smear your shit around.

[djonni greazo]

[quote name="dickzilla"]
[quote name="i am the pink lizard"]you take one piece of toilet paper and fold it over itself twice. now, take off the corner at the "fulcrum" so that when you unfold the paper, it has a hole in the middle. now put your middle finger through that hole and then wipe your ass with said finger (without dirtying up the paper). when you think you're done cleaning your rear mess, fold the paper over your finger to clean it then tuck it away (in a pocket) for further use.[/quote]



except you also kept the corner you tore off to clean under your nail.

[/quote]



yes! i forgot about that detail.



anyway, i just realized i did not answer my own poll



sitting down, and fold



to further the discussion: do you guys read while in the toilet? have a radio/listen to music?



personally, i always take a book with me (unless i'm in a hurry) and sometimes put on a cd to drown out the neighbors so i can read in peace

[supa tuna]

i squarsh and surf

[zim]

[quote name="dickzilla"]i squarsh and surf[/quote]



it's the best

[supa tuna]

[quote name="zim"]
[quote name="dickzilla"]i squarsh and surf[/quote]



it's the best[/quote]



indeed



scrubs ftw

[TamPron]

standing up

[Abzu]

Wrong thread?