CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Shoot the shit with other metal folk. Free discussion on any topic that doesn't suit the other forums. Avoid mentioning carpet.
Post Reply
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

The band has been offered an endorsement deal with an energy drink called CRUNK!!!!1111!1!!!11 and having tried it today it appears to be the real life version of Powerthirst. I'm not overly keen on being sponsered by a company that also deals with Lil Jon, nor am I too keen on having to drink this stuff on stage. Apparently we'd be the first UK endorsees though and it's already big in America, or so I'm told.



So my question remains, anyone else tried this god awful beverage?
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
zim
Zim(a)
Posts: 26876
Joined: 14 Apr 2009, 02:36
Location: couch

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by zim »

I haven't tried it but it is somewhat popular. Go for the endorsement!
the dead vote well wrote:
18 Jun 2021, 04:22
moving from a garbage disposal back to the dumpster but it’s an improvement nonetheless
User avatar
scarica
Ancient One
Posts: 2127
Joined: 13 Apr 2009, 15:18
Location: hwy 180 burrito shop

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by scarica »

CRUNK!!!!!2111211123234!!!
<a class="bbc_url" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKyve_IO ... e_IO0nA</a>

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="ANGEL OF DESEASE">
when a lady lick the nipple, the ding-ding start to smile
</blockquote>
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

Grabby gets it.
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs
Metal God
Posts: 16188
Joined: 19 Apr 2009, 22:00
Location: The Galactic Rock 'n' Roll Empire
Contact:

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs »

I'm white.
Image

 
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

That doesn't make your opinion any less valid
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs
Metal God
Posts: 16188
Joined: 19 Apr 2009, 22:00
Location: The Galactic Rock 'n' Roll Empire
Contact:

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs »

But, but...I'm white AND old! I cannot possibly be hip to these things.
Image

 
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

I'm not hip to this jive either. I mean look at the description they give...



Image



Seriously.



SERIOUSLY.
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs
Metal God
Posts: 16188
Joined: 19 Apr 2009, 22:00
Location: The Galactic Rock 'n' Roll Empire
Contact:

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs »

Can somebody PLEASE translate said ad into English? Thank you.
Image

 
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

"Everyone involved in this company is about 40 years old. We've brought in Lil Jon to talk to you young folk, but all he did was talk about bitches and such. Because of this, we got Keith from Marketing to watch a few episodes of Biker Mice From Mars so he could learn how to communicate to the youth of today. He noted that they seem quite into being extreme, so he replaced any constructive adjectives with the word "EXTREME", taking care to always write it in capitals. He also capitalised the brand name and added three exclaimation marks on the end to make it look like we, like you, think that proper grammar is for squares. Now get down with your bad selves and wave your hands in the air like you just don't care!"
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
jawn galliano
Yahtzee Genius
Posts: 24012
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 04:24

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by jawn galliano »

[quote name="Devy"]I'm not hip to this jive either. I mean look at the description they give...



Image



Seriously.



SERIOUSLY.[/quote]



hahaha, amazing!! what exactly do you get out of this endorsement arrangement?
User avatar
scarica
Ancient One
Posts: 2127
Joined: 13 Apr 2009, 15:18
Location: hwy 180 burrito shop

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by scarica »

i love shouting the word CRUNK!!!@@!@# in the middle of a paragraph. it's like the peewee's playhouse word of the day!
<a class="bbc_url" href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sKyve_IO ... e_IO0nA</a>

<blockquote class="ipsBlockquote" data-author="ANGEL OF DESEASE">
when a lady lick the nipple, the ding-ding start to smile
</blockquote>
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

[quote name="Famous Mortimer"]
[quote name="Devy"]I'm not hip to this jive either. I mean look at the description they give...



Image



Seriously.



SERIOUSLY.[/quote]



hahaha, amazing!! what exactly do you get out of this endorsement arrangement?[/quote]



Free shit with CRUNK!!! written on it. Hilarious as that would be, I don't think the metal community will take us very seriously if we're pausing between songs to chug from cans of CRUNK!!!, always making sure to have the logo facng the crowd for MAXIMUM EXTREME PRODUCT PLACEMENT TO THE EXTREMELY EXTREME MAX!!!!!!!!
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
jawn galliano
Yahtzee Genius
Posts: 24012
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 04:24

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by jawn galliano »

what you do, is take the deal, and then at the end of a set, have one band member very clearly and deliberately chug down some CRUNK!!! for all the crowd to see, and then immediately fall down in a giant display of homosexuality to the ground in a fit of convulsions. make the people associate CRUNK!!! brand Energy Drink with grotesque and potentially fatal reactions, that's quality marketing right there
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

The weirdest part was the ingredients list. If I've learnt only one thing from Metal Gear Solid 3 it's that you don't consume something with a name that sounds like poison. So when I read the side of the can, my snake sense tingled.



HORNY GOAT WEED

SKULL CAP

ASHWAGANDA



Seriously, look it up. I don't care if they're healthy, one of them is called skull cap! FUCKING SKULL CAP! That's not the name of something that's completely healthy! As for horny goat weed, they claim it improves erectile function, just the thing I want when I'm on stage in front of a load of people who may or may not have cameras and big tits.



I may take your advice though sir. I'll either do that or try and get a meeting with Lil Jon, at which I'll repeatedly punch him for doing whatever it is that he does.
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs
Metal God
Posts: 16188
Joined: 19 Apr 2009, 22:00
Location: The Galactic Rock 'n' Roll Empire
Contact:

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Inverted Crosses And Gorebongs »

[quote name="Devy"]"Everyone involved in this company is about 40 years old. We've brought in Lil Jon to talk to you young folk, but all he did was talk about bitches and such. Because of this, we got Keith from Marketing to watch a few episodes of Biker Mice From Mars so he could learn how to communicate to the youth of today. He noted that they seem quite into being extreme, so he replaced any constructive adjectives with the word "EXTREME", taking care to always write it in capitals. He also capitalised the brand name and added three exclaimation marks on the end to make it look like we, like you, think that proper grammar is for squares. Now get down with your bad selves and wave your hands in the air like you just don't care!"[/quote]





What the gay? :lol:
Image

 
User avatar
Mr. P
Ancient One
Posts: 4211
Joined: 16 Apr 2009, 16:25

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Mr. P »

Hey Devy, what should you do for them and what do you get from them?
:xx:
User avatar
Holocaust
Metal God
Posts: 10733
Joined: 16 Apr 2009, 07:03
Location: Your mom

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Holocaust »

[quote name="shitty the sandwitch"]
[quote name="Devy"]"Everyone involved in this company is about 40 years old. We've brought in Lil Jon to talk to you young folk, but all he did was talk about bitches and such. Because of this, we got Keith from Marketing to watch a few episodes of Biker Mice From Mars so he could learn how to communicate to the youth of today. He noted that they seem quite into being extreme, so he replaced any constructive adjectives with the word "EXTREME", taking care to always write it in capitals. He also capitalised the brand name and added three exclaimation marks on the end to make it look like we, like you, think that proper grammar is for squares. Now get down with your bad selves and wave your hands in the air like you just don't care!"[/quote]





What the gay? :lol:[/quote]



I would have bought a product with this description.
Image
User avatar
TamPron
Metal God
Posts: 16582
Joined: 24 Apr 2009, 00:50
Location: Rod Stewart
Contact:

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by TamPron »

I think you should take the endorsement...i mean, what could be more awesome than a death metal band endorsed by a product aimed at blacks and wiggers?





You should take it, and totally make fun of the product, like have your singer plug it on stage saying that advertisement, ver batim, in an obviously mocking tone of voice. You guys would be fools not to accept this
[quote name="Extreme Noise Tara"]They are. [/quote]

Image
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

My thoughts exactly, except for the part where we actually take it. I'm not even considering being part of it and will probably walk if the rest of the band think this is a sensible move.
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
Grudge
Metal God
Posts: 10523
Joined: 15 Apr 2009, 10:23

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Grudge »

SELLLOUTTTT
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

I don't suppose your advertising company is looking for a band to endorse is it?
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
Grudge
Metal God
Posts: 10523
Joined: 15 Apr 2009, 10:23

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Grudge »

No. We only endorse big sellouts
User avatar
bills bro
Ancient One
Posts: 1914
Joined: 14 Apr 2009, 00:39

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by bills bro »

I tried looking for this during my food shopping today but couldn't find it :oldryan:



I can't imagine drinking energy drinks each night on a tour would be that healthy, especially since you'd need to sleep at some point. Maybe you could just wash out a can and fill it with water/soda/beer etc, before each show? :)
User avatar
Devy
Metal God
Posts: 8634
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 01:04

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Devy »

Well, shit
[quote name="ANGEL OF DESEASE"]He is going to paint with brown colour the name of Morbid Angel. The colour of the shit of course.[/quote]

[quote name="Ninny"]There was a whistling fat woman at the bus stop, I had to walk away[/quote]
User avatar
TamPron
Metal God
Posts: 16582
Joined: 24 Apr 2009, 00:50
Location: Rod Stewart
Contact:

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by TamPron »

[quote name="Devy"]My thoughts exactly, except for the part where we actually take it. I'm not even considering being part of it and will probably walk if the rest of the band think this is a sensible move.[/quote]

:frown:



you sound like someone who takes themselves too seriously. You obviously do not realize how much fun you can have with this....Example: take the deal, play a show, and just totally insult the product & the company and throw it all over the stage or something....The possibilities are endless....



there are alot of things I would rather not think about, that I would do to be in your position sir.
[quote name="Extreme Noise Tara"]They are. [/quote]

Image
User avatar
Mr. P
Ancient One
Posts: 4211
Joined: 16 Apr 2009, 16:25

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Mr. P »

[quote name="Pentelesh"]Hey Devy, what should you do for them and what do you get from them?[/quote]

??
:xx:
User avatar
jawn galliano
Yahtzee Genius
Posts: 24012
Joined: 17 Apr 2009, 04:24

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by jawn galliano »

[quote name="Pentelesh"]
[quote name="Pentelesh"]Hey Devy, what should you do for them and what do you get from them?[/quote]

??[/quote]



[quote name="Devy"]Free shit with CRUNK!!! written on it. Hilarious as that would be, I don't think the metal community will take us very seriously if we're pausing between songs to chug from cans of CRUNK!!!, always making sure to have the logo facng the crowd for MAXIMUM EXTREME PRODUCT PLACEMENT TO THE EXTREMELY EXTREME MAX!!!!!!!![/quote]
User avatar
Mr. P
Ancient One
Posts: 4211
Joined: 16 Apr 2009, 16:25

Re: CRUNK!!! Any of you coons tried it?

Post by Mr. P »

[quote name="Famous Mortimer"]
[quote name="Pentelesh"]
[quote name="Pentelesh"]Hey Devy, what should you do for them and what do you get from them?[/quote]

??[/quote]



[quote name="Devy"]Free shit with CRUNK!!! written on it. Hilarious as that would be, I don't think the metal community will take us very seriously if we're pausing between songs to chug from cans of CRUNK!!!, always making sure to have the logo facng the crowd for MAXIMUM EXTREME PRODUCT PLACEMENT TO THE EXTREMELY EXTREME MAX!!!!!!!![/quote][/quote]



Totally missed that text. Don't do it.
:xx:
Post Reply