post jokes

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 22 Dec 2010, 07:15

[youtube]f9yEcXWxz34[/youtube]

captain twat. IV. · Post by **captain twat. IV.** » 22 Dec 2010, 09:04

"I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he's 84).

We decided to grab a bite at the food court.

I noticed he was watching a teenager next to him.

The teenager had spiked hair in all different colours: Green, Red, Orange, Blue, etc..

My dad kept staring at him.

The teenager would look and find him staring every time.

When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked:

"What's the matter old man ? Never done anything wild in your life ?"

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he'd have a good one.

And in classic style he didn't bat an eye in his response:

"Got stoned once and ****ed a peacock. I was just wondering if you're my son.""

Love of Lava · Post by **Love of Lava** » 22 Dec 2010, 20:53

[quote name="mabb_"]"I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he's 84).

We decided to grab a bite at the food court.

I noticed he was watching a teenager next to him.

The teenager had spiked hair in all different colours: Green, Red, Orange, Blue, etc..

My dad kept staring at him.

The teenager would look and find him staring every time.

When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked:

"What's the matter old man ? Never done anything wild in your manwhore ?"

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he'd have a good one.

And in classic style he didn't bat an eye in his response:

"Got stoned once and ****ed a peacock. I was just wondering if you're my son.""[/quote]

Ninny · Post by **Ninny** » 23 Dec 2010, 01:09

[quote name="Verbal"][youtube]f9yEcXWxz34[/youtube][/quote]

Very funny man

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 23 Dec 2010, 01:10

[quote name="Ninny"]
[quote name="Verbal"][youtube]f9yEcXWxz34[/youtube][/quote]

Very funny man

[/quote]

true dat

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 23 Dec 2010, 02:07

[youtube]YkgDhDa4HHo[/youtube]

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 23 Dec 2010, 08:26

[quote name="Zajebiste!"][youtube]YkgDhDa4HHo[/youtube][/quote]

good video

Mesarthim · Post by **Mesarthim** » 23 Dec 2010, 10:30

did you hear about the hard-on bearer that got his left arm and leg cut off in a freak accident?

he's all-right now though.

jawn galliano · Post by **jawn galliano** » 23 Dec 2010, 11:02

:arresteddevelopment:

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 23 Dec 2010, 19:49

[quote name="Verbal"]
[quote name="Zajebiste!"][youtube]YkgDhDa4HHo[/youtube][/quote]

good video[/quote]

You would love doug.

[youtube]hkCR-w3AYOE[/youtube]

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 25 Dec 2010, 07:55

Did you hear about all the guide dogs gone missing?

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 25 Dec 2010, 08:58

[quote name="Verbal"]
[quote name="Ninny"]
[quote name="Verbal"][youtube]f9yEcXWxz34[/youtube][/quote]

Very funny man

[/quote]

true dat[/quote]

Seen him in a couple flicks with Simon Pegg. Never fails to make me chuckle, that one.

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 25 Dec 2010, 20:25

The movies are so-so.

His stand up is where it's at followed closely by 'black books.'

[youtube]eY0A-15JQ8k[/youtube]

rhino · Post by **rhino** » 26 Dec 2010, 03:27

[quote name="mabb_"]"I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he's 84).

We decided to grab a bite at the food court.

I noticed he was watching a teenager next to him.

The teenager had spiked hair in all different colours: Green, Red, Orange, Blue, etc..

My dad kept staring at him.

The teenager would look and find him staring every time.

When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked:

"What's the matter old man ? Never done anything wild in your manwhore ?"

Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response, knowing he'd have a good one.

And in classic style he didn't bat an eye in his response:

"Got stoned once and ****ed a peacock. I was just wondering if you're my son.""[/quote]

captain twat. IV. · Post by **captain twat. IV.** » 26 Dec 2010, 08:57

If you don't laugh at this hard-on bearer..wow

[youtube]LZJ-_OTvsqo[/youtube]

[youtube]VEfL11huQxY[/youtube]

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 26 Dec 2010, 22:10

Yeah, ive seen him , he's awesome

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 26 Dec 2010, 23:38

"it seemed so plausible"

hmm

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 27 Dec 2010, 01:42

[quote name="Verbal"]"it seemed so plausible"

hmm[/quote]

yeeeeeeaaaaaahhh I caught that too. "doubleoldlewisblack:

Otherwise, I dig this duder.

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 27 Dec 2010, 01:45

[quote name="desolation"]
[quote name="Verbal"]"it seemed so plausible"

hmm[/quote]

yeeeeeeaaaaaahhh I caught that too. "doubleoldlewisblack:

Otherwise, I dig this duder.[/quote]

bill hicks!

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 27 Dec 2010, 01:51

new stewart lee dvd

BUY IT!

http://www.ionlinemovie.com/Movie/Comed ... or-One-0-0

paint: this ones probably better http://www.megavideo.com/?v=2CC423OQ

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 27 Dec 2010, 02:03

Ah shit you're right - I mixed up my religion rants

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 27 Dec 2010, 02:08

i dont think ive seen a lewis black one..

bring it to me

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 27 Dec 2010, 02:22

[youtube]EWqtpqQjNug[/youtube]

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 29 Dec 2010, 07:53

any of ye watch the stewart lee gig?

heres frankie boyles new show (only just started watching it, but can confirm that the first few minutes of episode one are good):

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/fran ... od#3144539

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 30 Dec 2010, 07:58

i case there has been sarding, the stewart lee gig and the frankie boyle series are both worth watching

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 30 Dec 2010, 08:04

I saw the stewart lee gig live, it was awesome. Did you see frankie present never mind the buzzcocks?

Gonna watch tramadol nights now.

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 30 Dec 2010, 08:09

i saw frankie present it last season

is that the one you mean?

havent really seen any of this season of buzzcocks

simon amstell was the man.. actually, isnt he supposed to be doing some stand up? probably wont be as good, but i want to see that anyway

on the second last of the tramadol nights now

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 30 Dec 2010, 08:11

peep show episode 6 of season 7 is now on 4od as well

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 30 Dec 2010, 08:12

I think simon amstels stand up is on DVD.

I THINK.

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 30 Dec 2010, 08:42

theres no way its going to be as good as he was on buzzcocks!

post here if you finds it, though

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 30 Dec 2010, 22:52

http://www.movielink4u.co.cc/2010/11/si ... _3591.html

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 10 Jan 2011, 00:48

[quote name="Zajebiste!"]I think simon amstels stand up is on DVD.

I THINK.[/quote]

what did you think of simon amstell gig, peep show, and tramadol nights?

supa tuna · Post by **supa tuna** » 11 Jan 2011, 01:18

[youtube]TG4f9zR5yzY[/youtube]

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 11 Jan 2011, 08:18

[quote name="'zilla"][youtube]TG4f9zR5yzY[/youtube][/quote]

I love that entire set! Have you seen his new one?

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 11 Jan 2011, 08:21

dylan moran, frankie boyle, jim jeffries, simon amstell, stewart lee >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> george carlin, lewis black and louis ck

paint: although my opinon of jim jeffries,lewis black and louis ck is based only on the videos in this thread

supa tuna · Post by **supa tuna** » 11 Jan 2011, 09:32

[quote name="desolation"]
[quote name="'zilla"][youtube]TG4f9zR5yzY[/youtube][/quote]

I love that entire set! Have you seen his new one?[/quote]

yeah, last night, it was great.

Hugo. · Post by **Hugo.** » 11 Jan 2011, 16:50

[quote name="Verbal"]
[quote name="Zajebiste!"]I think simon amstels stand up is on DVD.

I THINK.[/quote]

what did you think of simon amstell gig, peep show, and tramadol nights?[/quote]

I'm not really up to date with amstells stand up or tramadol nights. ive been busy.

Peep show is great. Ive come around to the mitchell and webb look too.

EDIT: all this talk about comedians and you or anyone else have failed to comment in the doug stanhope thread. Shame on you.

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 12 Jan 2011, 03:29

[quote name="Verbal"]dylan moran, frankie boyle, jim jeffries, simon amstell, stewart lee >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> george carlin, lewis black and louis ck

paint: although my opinon of jim jeffries,lewis black and louis ck is based only on the videos in this thread[/quote]

You shut your fucking mouth about Carlin, splendid mate of mine, or he will rise from the grave and shove cancers up you and your family's asses!!!!

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 12 Jan 2011, 03:33

colorectal cancer is awesome

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 12 Jan 2011, 06:59

[quote name="Verbal"]colorectal cancer is awesome[/quote]

You've had it?

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 12 Jan 2011, 07:05

[quote name="desolation"]
[quote name="Verbal"]colorectal cancer is awesome[/quote]

You've had it?[/quote]

no but i plan on getting it

supa tuna · Post by **supa tuna** » 12 Jan 2011, 07:50

thats the funniest thing i've ever heard you say.

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 15 Jan 2011, 07:02

[quote name="Verbal"][youtube]f9yEcXWxz34[/youtube][/quote]

i still find this funny

supa tuna · Post by **supa tuna** » 15 Jan 2011, 09:04

i'm guessing that's why you posted it.

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 15 Jan 2011, 09:11

youre a good guesser

supa tuna · Post by **supa tuna** » 15 Jan 2011, 11:04

Mr. P · Post by **Mr. P** » 15 Jan 2011, 14:17

[youtube]kAG39jKi0lI[/youtube]

supa tuna · Post by **supa tuna** » 16 Jan 2011, 02:12

[quote name="Pentelesh"][youtube]kAG39jKi0lI[/youtube][/quote]

now thats fucking funny

Verbal · Post by **Verbal** » 16 Jan 2011, 03:33

its ok at best

Abzu · Post by **Abzu** » 16 Jan 2011, 03:42

[quote name="Verbal"]its ok at best[/quote]

You're ok at best.