Cleanest fridge ever
Posted: 10 Oct 2009, 04:27
Cleanest fridge ever
I cleaned my fridge yesterday.
I did not just clean it well, I cleaned it exceptionally well. I pulled out all the shelves and drawers and lugged them into the back yard and scrubbed them down with bleach and dish detergent. The inside of my fridge was gleaming and sanitized when I was finished.
Big deal, thinketh you, I have cleaned my fridge before as well.
Ah, but as I was standing there admiring my clean fridge, there was a sudden rumble and a flash of lightning and a man stood in the kitchen with me.
"I have hailed from the future!" he cried "I have taken this portentous journey back in time to observe the cleanest fridge that ever existed!"
I observed the man of the future who wore a silver suit, a skullcap, opened toed sandals and a giant neon penis gourd that said 'Nike' on the side.
I stood aside so he could get a better view.
"Oh nice," said the man of the future. He bent forward and snapped a picture with a Bic cigarette lighter.
Suddenly there was a dual flash of lightning and two more people stood in my kitchen. They wore black uniforms with a shiny silver badges and each sported a stately polished cherry wood penis gourd.
"You are in violation of temporal travel laws!" They bellowed in unison.
The man screeched and turned to run away, but his penis gourd 'fwapped' on the side of my fridge and he fell over. The two future officers stared in horror at the smudge he had left. "You have changed the temporal context!" one of them cried.
One of the officers then pulled out a little silver gun and shot the original time travel. He screamed and disengaged into a pile of ashes. The officer then shot his partner and then himself.
I stared at the pile of ashes on the floor for a moment and then there was another flash of lightning and a little robot appeared and quietly hoovered up all the ashes before another flash of lightning whisked it away.
And that's how I knew I had the cleanest fridge ever.
I cleaned my fridge yesterday.
I did not just clean it well, I cleaned it exceptionally well. I pulled out all the shelves and drawers and lugged them into the back yard and scrubbed them down with bleach and dish detergent. The inside of my fridge was gleaming and sanitized when I was finished.
Big deal, thinketh you, I have cleaned my fridge before as well.
Ah, but as I was standing there admiring my clean fridge, there was a sudden rumble and a flash of lightning and a man stood in the kitchen with me.
"I have hailed from the future!" he cried "I have taken this portentous journey back in time to observe the cleanest fridge that ever existed!"
I observed the man of the future who wore a silver suit, a skullcap, opened toed sandals and a giant neon penis gourd that said 'Nike' on the side.
I stood aside so he could get a better view.
"Oh nice," said the man of the future. He bent forward and snapped a picture with a Bic cigarette lighter.
Suddenly there was a dual flash of lightning and two more people stood in my kitchen. They wore black uniforms with a shiny silver badges and each sported a stately polished cherry wood penis gourd.
"You are in violation of temporal travel laws!" They bellowed in unison.
The man screeched and turned to run away, but his penis gourd 'fwapped' on the side of my fridge and he fell over. The two future officers stared in horror at the smudge he had left. "You have changed the temporal context!" one of them cried.
One of the officers then pulled out a little silver gun and shot the original time travel. He screamed and disengaged into a pile of ashes. The officer then shot his partner and then himself.
I stared at the pile of ashes on the floor for a moment and then there was another flash of lightning and a little robot appeared and quietly hoovered up all the ashes before another flash of lightning whisked it away.
And that's how I knew I had the cleanest fridge ever.
